Monsters of Television

“Of course he’s still alive. Haven’t you ever seen a John Carpenter movie?”

They can see you. And they’re totally grossed out.

So on Tuesday I watched the penultimate episode of Lost, a show with so many plot points and mysteries and characters and secret organizations/alliances/double-crosses/betrayals/dimensions/timelines that no one is certain how they can contain it all in a single series, let alone how to hit on everything from episode to episode. So many loose ends to attack and so many characters to mug. And yet, their episodes never feel like they’re short-changing anyone. Chuck, while having a moderately-sized cast and a certain level of mystery, does not have the ever-expanding intrigue Lost has built in six years but failed tonight with an overpacked episode before the finale.

Now, it’s a little unfair to compare Chuck to Lost since the latter is one of the most narratively complex series since Grey’s Anatomy (I still don’t get that show) and Chuck leans barely enough into drama that it doesn’t have a laugh track. But they are both serialized dramas and Chuck allowed itself to drain the emotion out of an episode to make room for more story, more setup, more threads to continue into the end of this mini-season. And I get that these last few episodes are, in fact, a mini-season, extras tagged onto the end of what the producers felt would be the end of Season 3. But too much was stuffed in here, to the detriment of what could have been.

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“Monday night can be a bit of a wasteland.”

This is a movie I would watch.

All they needed was a shot of Shaw sitting in a cave and telling Chuck to slide.

Though it hasn’t been made explicitly clear, I like to think what has expedited Chuck’s condition (if it was inevitable at all) is PTSD from actively shooting a person. Popping caps into Supes so his drugged-out crush object can push him off a bridge into a river can’t be easy to live with, especially for a pansy like Chuck. The fact that this was never addressed in the shiny, happy episode after (“vs The Honeymooners”) and, really, not until this very week, not only seems weird (Chuck in a de facto red test after an entire series of being afraid of guns would probably be something to talk about) but yet another missed opportunity. But it’s here now and they pull it off.

I’m a sucker for episodes of television where reality is distorted by the subconscious or some kind of cranial malady (drug scenes excluded because they are almost always exceptionally lame) in an effort to create surreal, symbolic visions of reality. Some might see it as a crutch but I see it as a chance to expand story. This belongs to the latter. As we press onward to further the connection between Chuck and his father, bolstered by a sub-A story discussing him, the Intersect co-mingling with Chuck’s deep, dark chemical responses adds a new wrinkle to their storytelling, especially if they tie this into the crushing stress Chuck has to feel with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Possibilities abound. Unfortunately, after “vs The Honeymooners,” I’m wary of what they’ll do with it.

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“I am not letting you shoot a tiger. They are endangered and majestic.”

This has nothing to do with the plot.

Better.

After an episode where Chuck and Sarah act like foolish children, it’s a relief to find them as just regular old romantic idealists. After three years of repression, the compression of their relationship makes sense and their reaction to being unburdened feels right. Last week, they were such idiots that not even a new relationship compounded by the romantic intoxication of Europe could explain how experienced spies could be such rubes. But, in Burbank, Sarah seems much more grounded and Chuck — well, Chuck has been waiting for this not only for the past three years but his enitre life so he’s footloose and fancy-free. Even if last week had some moments where the couple worked in-synch with each other to demonstrate how close they were, it seemed almost surreal, like some saccharine dream Chuck was having. Here, they work as a team and it doesn’t feel cheesy. It’s the coupling as I’d hoped it would be: a continuation of their previous relationship just more comfortable.

Maybe one day they can be as cool a couple as Morgan and Casey.

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“Can’t. You see, in my head, the only way the plane remains aloft is if I’m rooting for it.”

Slight disparity in nighttime wear.

What a waste.

If you’ve been following my reviews of Chuck, you’ll notice an increased enthusiasm for the growing intensity and a demonstration of better story-telling in the last few weeks. Some might even say it was “overly optimistic.” Nay, I said, not overly optimistic. This is clearly where this show is going and finally (finally!) they know where they’re going. This is a mature show, a show with direction, a show with purpose, a show that knows who it is and that will take it over the bubble so it can anchor a soon-to-be fledgling NBC schedule. And then I get this.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to see Chuck and Sarah’s turn of events. Happy to see them air out their opposite-of-differences (concordances?) and finally tell each other how they really feel. Sorry if I spoiled it for anyone but, yes, it finally happened. Chuck and Sarah have finally admitted it to each other (for the hundredth time) and they are together. So much opportunity to treat this burgeoning relationship with the same dark (for Chuck) touch that has haunted the season, I waited for them mull over what makes this thing hard, one the Cardinal Rule of Spying is “Never fall in love (especially with a spy).” They’re targets that make the other person vulnerable in hostage situations. They’re always in danger. They’re always pretending to be someone else. But it was not to be in this episode

Okay, maybe those themes are a little too much pressure on an event that has been three years in the making, one that has been doggedly desired by superfans everywhere. But I wanted them to maintain the darker tone of this season. It’s hard to demand something more realistic from a show about a guy that holds all the government’s secrets in his head because he saw a picture of a sunflower, but maybe I wanted something more grounded.

Instead I got something treacly, oversentimental, divergent from tone, and with not enough Jeffster.

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“Dude, you are misquoting the line and you are ruining Pretty in Pink for me!”

Why do they still have a corded PS1 controller?

So what do the shippers have to live for now?

I was skeptical of this episode going in. Chuck has been on the bubble, more so since its recent plummet in ratings, and TV bloggers, producers, actors, and fans have united into a Save Our Chuck task force. They’ve put together Twitter trending topics and a media blitz that seems to be all I see. I wouldn’t notice so much if it weren’t their mantra, renewed every week: “This episode of Chuck is the best episode to date/of the season.” Now, granted, these episodes lately have been much better and certainly a step in the right direction if they aim to be an anchor in NBC’s schedule but the constant hype for the current week’s episode is starting to just become noise. Maybe I just pay more attention than the average bear to people who are really into TV but it’s all becoming a jumble of hyperbole and desperate pleas to save the show. I mean, I want the show to be saved, too, but they’re using the same rhetoric for “vs American Hero” as they did for “vs The Fake Name” (you remember — the one where we learn Sarah’s name is really Sam and then it’s never brought up again). If you say every episode is awesome and none are unawesome then every episode, by definition, is just mediocre. So I went into this week ready to be disappointed, that rant plus more in the holster, ready to be pulled when the show didn’t live up to expectations.

The bulk of that rant will remain in the holster.

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“That’s where you’re wrong, Casey. Because love — love is a battlefield.”

Legion of doom.

It’s a good thing Chuck is leaving town. With as many people roaming around that know his “secret” life, another year and he’d have the entire city of Burbank implicated in the war on terror.

The would-be season finale starts off with Chuck getting his badge and his first assignment, a pretty cush deal with a cover as a billionaire playboy in Italy complete with villa and generous stipend. Chuck, however, would rather stay in Burbank with Sarah. Adorable. Kid’s an idiot but adorable. But before he blabs that to the General, she mentions he gets to pick his own team and we see a twinkle in Bartowski’s eye. Why not live up the spy life with his best girl that he’s never actually had? Wait, I seem to remember him saying that Ellie was his best girl at some point. We’re going to assume he’s never had her either.

Anyway, this leads to Team Get Sarah Walker Back. Because Chuck, despite several pretty winning attempts at wooing Sarah in the past, is now somehow dumbfounded as to how to win her over this time, Morgan, Awesome, and Casey (all with their own stake in his getting Sarah) decide to approach this by committee. It was weird to see so many people come out of the woodwork and all of them know what’s going on with Chuck. I think, officially, everyone on the first floor of their apartment complex is in the know except Ellie. But that’s only because she’s not weirded out by constant helicopters and mysterious disappearances. We’ll say she’s selectively oblivious.

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“I really hope that wasn’t me.”

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre franchise is really running out of ideas.

Finally, someone let Casey out of his cage. The man has been trapped in the van for the better part of this season and it was time he had an episode that wasn’t a somewhat cheesy affair (like when it centered around his former sensei). Instead, we get some pretty heavy backstory, some Robert Patrick, and a dash of treason to whet our appetite for all things Casey. But, funnily enough, even when a story is Casey-centric, it all still reflects back on Chuck and Sarah.

I usually don’t do spoiler warnings since you, dear reader, are in fact reading a review of an episode post-first-run airing. But with so many things that happen for Casey’s character that are too good to just read about and not watch, I encourage you to peep the episode first before reading on so I don’t spoil any of the good stuff.

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Morgan: “Don’t freak out.”

The Ring fights dirty. Any gentleman knows that the appropriate weapon here is one of those giant forks. A gun is so uncouth.

Yes.

What I just watched was an episode tailor-made for fans. It’s like the writers sat in a room for three days and read every tweet of the rational fans (sorry, shippers) and dumped it all into a well-crafted episode. Don’t believe me? Big reveals? Check. Jeffster? Check. A whole lot of not-as-whiny Morgan? Check check.

In season 2, it was at about the four episodes before the end of the season (around “Chuck vs The Dream Job”) when the series started to open up a little more (Chuck finds his father, FULCRUM attempts to make intersect agents, lots of Chuck and Sarah going off-book) and that’s about what we’re getting now since the original order for Chuck eps was at 13 going in. Happily, we have more Chuck to look forward to (NBC ordered more) but their plans haven’t changed and we get what I consider one of the best episodes of this show we’ve seen yet. Top 5 material. Let’s get into it.

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“Geez. This unlucky guy’s about to get double dead.”

I get it that you kids are starting something up but pull it together. At least wait until your boss stops talking to you.

Last time we met, we had a situation where people protested the ending of “Chuck vs The Mask,” insisting that the show violated the trust of the audience by separating the perpetually almost-couple Chuck and Sarah. “No! They can’t be okay that they’re apart! They love each other! Why can’t they just be together?” Good thing these kids weren’t around for Ross and Rachel (or worse, Maddie and David). Three weeks the fans waited through what NBC termed a reset (to erase the sentiment against the network for what happened in late-night) as the writers and producers did damage control. “Just wait. It’ll be worth it. Trust us.” So we waited.

The thing is, I thought giving Chuck and Sarah some time apart was a good move. Not only did it give a realistic obstacle to continue the tension but giving them someone else to devote their attentions to opened the door to new dramatic paths. So I sat down to watch “Chuck vs The Fake Name” to see what the writers would do with their new playground.

They kind of pooched it.

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“Those two gab like little school girls when they’re out in the field. It’s murder on the ears.”

The face of doom.

What are you guys crying about?

I don’t typically delve into the dens of inequity that are the message boards and comment streams but I keep hearing about this episode being controversial, a game-changer, even ruinous of the series. Surely, these reactionists aren’t responding to the ending of this episode. They are, aren’t they? Wow. Really? Because Chuck has slept or necked with two other girls that aren’t Sarah during the course of the show, one of whom was the stated love of his life. Where were you when Bryce came back? When Cole was tempting Sarah? Careful, sweethearts. You whine like this enough and you’ll sound like — well, Chuck.

For those unaware, the ending of “Chuck vs The Mask” seemed to provide fodder for those heavily-invested in the Chuck/Sarah relationship to riot in the virtual streets at how the show is being taken irreparably off-course. TV-bloggers have spoken to the subject all day, educating me on the fanbase and the word “shippers” (a section of fandom I had not previously known). And, to be honest, I’m not exactly sure what fueled their fire.

Perhaps we should start from the beginning.

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