Monsters of Television

“It’s so primitive. I like it.“

What’s the difference between a giant robot tearing through the city and a souped up Cadillac? Answer: not a whole heck of a lot in the long run, but it makes a difference. I’m not a car guy, so racing stories don’t do a whole lot for me. And while my question above was largely rhetorical, it does speak to some very fine lines in what constitutes enjoyment. I mean, both the robot and the car are still mechanical objects that do quote-unquote cool things. I just happen to prefer those cool things performed by a robot.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to really respond to “Roar of the White Dragon” or not for that reason. But as the Titan finally appears at the end of the episode, I found myself extremely disappointed that it even showed up at all. Which shows how effective the story within the episode was. Read more »

“You’re wrong again. If my superpower were arrogance my name would be Dr. Arroganto.”

The Big Bang Theory made great strides this week in overcoming some of the issues people take with the show. It featured serialized story, developed a character and remembered there are other characters on the show than just Penny and Sheldon. However, some gags that can only be described as “overly sitcomy” hampered the progress the show was trying to make.

The episode was funny, very much so, but after looking at the whole episode it feels as though it’s right back where it started. You do the math, see where we end up.

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“Hard to believe I’m not really not really in space.”

A lackluster episode of Community is still better than most comedy on television, so I can’t be too disappointed in “Basic Rocket Science” even if I do think it’s one of the weakest episodes the show has done in a while.

Like “American Poultry” and “Modern Warfare,” “Basic Rocket Science” is a high concept episode doing a full on riff of a particular film genre (in this case, space movies). I remember one of the critiques around “Modern Warfare” was that it didn’t serve the ensemble very well since they were dispatched so quickly (“Troy made God angry!”). My contention, that they needed to leave for the actual character impact to occur, Jeff and Britta having sex on the study table, would end up paying off in the end actually came true in the finale of last season and the premiere of this season.  Like the folks who were iffy on “Modern Warfare,” have the same quibble with “Basic Rocket Science”: where’s the character beat in this episode, because I’m not really feeling it. Read more »

“Dark hair. Bedroom eyes. Moody demeanor. I totally get it.“

When I reviewed the pilot episode of Sym-Bionic Titan, I figured that would be the only episode I covered, short of some really great episode on down the line. However, the review has garnered some really impressive numbers recently (for our site, anyway),  and even though we don’t generate revenue from the site, clearly there’s an interest in the show so I thought it might be a good idea to fill in some of the obvious gaps in the Web.

Now, page views aren’t the only things motivating me here. I quipped that Titan was the best new show of the fall if you liked giant robots. However, after having time to digest more of the offerings from the fall season, I can drop that qualifier a bit since Titan is still performing very well, with smart episodes so far (though I found the second episode a less than a fine follow-up). With Terriers, I think it’s probably my favorite new show.

That I like both Terriers and Titan probably says more about my tastes than anything else (I like giant robots and neo-noir (needless to say, I dig The Big O)), but I do think that Titan is a very very good show, one that appeals to all ages (though I think it’s a little less audience universal than Samurai Jack) and also has a clear sense of itself and what it wants to do, and on a base level, that’s a really a good sign for any series.

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“Can’t go 10 feet in America without having your death recorded.”

With everything from the finale now neatly taken care of last week, I feel like the show can properly start getting to work on telling this season’s stories. Yes, of course, the show is a very subtle serialized character drama so this season’s stories are connected to last season’s stories. But there are new stakes now and thus new stories to tell in relation to this serial.

But, as if to also take a narrative cooldown lap, “Breaking Fast” is largely one of those procedural episodes that the show excels at balancing against its character serialization. This, of course, isn’t a complaint. If you’re a regular reader of the blog, you already know that I love procedurals, and that I love serials. So I like when a show manages to execute both well, and I get very frustrated when the balance is thrown off in ways that simply don’t work for me. Read more »

“Turns out college is just high school with more expensive books.”

That is the smartest thing Serena van der Woodsen has ever said. And it’s so true too.

We have seen these characters move from high school to college and not much has changed. They’re all still petty and vindictive and selfish and wiling to walk all over one another to get what they want. They still fight over the same girls or boys, they still lie to one another, they still stab each other in the back. Nothing has changed.

Maybe that’s the point. Life doesn’t change much after high school. Sure groups of people may change and you’re setting eventually becomes a boardroom instead of a classroom, but you still deal with the same bullshit. God forbid we follow these terrible souls into the real world, I’m sure we’ll still find Serena and Blair competing with one another, Vanessa still vying for Dan’s affection, and everyone will still be sleeping with each other.

Life is just one long high school experience. Hope you guys enjoyed your time at Constance Billard, you’re gonna be stuck there for a long time. “Goodbye, Columbia” proved that much.

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“I’ve never, ever heard smooth jams.”

“Please come to my fantasy island, now with less socialism.”

Can we go ahead and call this show Morgan already?

He’s all that’s left for me on this show, the only one that has any obstacles or intrigue. Sure, everyone’s story in this episode was vapid and trite but Morgan’s stands out because there exists at least a little bit of tension. Besides, I think Chuck and Sarah might work better as secondary characters.

Alas, the name of the show is Chuck so we watch these two idiots work a flimsy thread and carry it out to the its illogical end. I know I’ve said this several times before but I think I’m actually going to have to listen to myself this time: this show doesn’t want to be what it was. It used to be a spy show about a guy that tries to reconcile his stagnent yet contented home life with a fantastical, dangerous, and exciting one that abandons his family. Season 4 is far, far away from the life of intrigue and struggle (such that it was in the balance with the goofy and the cartoonish). Chuck this season would rather be a broad comedy burdened with an hour-long format and this mythology people seem to keep coming back for. It’s a romantic romp with this spy thread to push it along. Ladies and gentlemen, no episode this season has screamed it out loud more: the ‘shippers have won. And maybe it’s time I accepted that there’s nothing wrong with that.

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“Aw, geeze, he must’ve gotten sucked into my enigma hole.”

I missed last week’s very fun send-up of noirs with Hank due to schedule craziness (read: I was dead tired). I really enjoyed the episode though as it tied up some dangling mysteries (never thought for a second that Dermott belonged to Brock) and paired Hank and Al together in a very productive (and meaningful way). But that episode has nothing on the sheer lunacy and cleverness of “Bright Lights, Dean City.” Read more »

“We’ve created a monster.”

Don Draper Confidantes Unite!

How many times are they going to beat into us that Betty has the mind of a child? Short of giving her a rattle and a diaper, I’m not sure how much more obvious they make it. It seems almost like the only development we get on her anymore is just how childish she can be. Even though she’s graduated to bitchy high school cheerleader in this episode, we usually get no breakthroughs, no progress, no plot points with her except at the end of this episode but it’s only to get back at her daughter in some sick competition for a creep show.

You’re totally picturing January Jones in a diaper, aren’t you?

While Betty showed off more of her juvenile side, Don showed what makes him special but it’s so far out that not even his own partners can see what he did. To be fair, though, radical moves don’t look great to partners when the walls are caving in. You know who gets it though, 100%? Of course Peggy does! It was partly her idea!

Also: I want to be able to say “get me my shoes” and have people worried that I’m leaving the company.

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Teach me, Uncle Mason.

Few broad comments before I get into the nitty gritty. First, I gotta say, I was kind of kidding in weeks past when I called Caroline, “Awesome Vampire Caroline” [AVC], but now I just have to make that her official name. TVD has officially proven that the best way to make a bad character better is to kill him/her. And then make him/her undead.

I know that just being supernatural doesn’t work because Bonnie sucks. She’s whiny, bitter, and boring. AVC, on the other hand, is whiny, bitter, and exciting!

Other characters deserving of such treatment? Consider the possibilities. On TVD, there’s Jeremy, obviously. But outside this show? Would becoming undead make Tara on True Blood cooler? I bet it would. What about that girl with an addiction on Rubicon? She could use a little undead action. Don’s ex on Mad Men?  Way better as a vampire–all her particularities would become evil distortions.  Alex on Grey’s Anatomy?  Dwight on The Office?  Gosh, this is a fun game. Wanna play?

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