Monsters of Television

“All those stories you’ve heard about him: they’re not stories, they’re true.“

As you may have already guessed, I wasn’t crazy about the episode. There’s stuff I like it, but that’s the stuff I’m assuming, hoping, they’re going to expand on in part two (I do love the episode title for part two). The rest of it remained kind of all over the place, and the big reveal really wasn’t all that big.

Which leaves me kind of unexcited about having to wait until September to see how it all finishes. I mean, I’ll be tuning in, of course, but the thrill of it is gone. The (nearly) all-consuming concerns about this child I think has become something of an weight the on show for me, but this could simply be because I don’t really care now.

And it also didn’t have nearly enough of the Cybermen. So it was already in the hole for me after that.

Read more »

“It’s not fair, and…you know, it hurts like hell, but…it’s worth it.”

I really believed that this was the best sandwich Dean's ever eaten.

I didn’t cry while watching this episode on the bus. Really. I didn’t. It was allergies.

Okay.

I totally cried. When Dean sees Mary. When he talks to John’s grave. When Sam’s all “Dude, we’ve never been friends. We see each other at holidays. What are you doing right now?”

No. I’m not crying just thinking about it. I have allergies. Pollen’s been really bad this year. No rain and all. You know how it is.

Sniffle.

All kidding aside, I enjoyed the episode (although I’m not kidding about the crying. I totally did). It’s a nice button on Dean’s arc this season, and I couldn’t ask for a better episode going into the finale.

Read more »

“I know he must be punished, but all I ask is mercy.”

"The madness of mercy."

Have I mentioned how exhausting I find this show? Not recently? Well, it’s exhausting.

This week my exhaustion stems from the fact that this episode throws the show’s normal narrative pacing to the wind and packs in what was about a month, month and a half worth of in-story events into a single episode. Never have ravens flown faster or people covered more ground than in this episode. And since the episode doesn’t make clear how much time is passing, the episode feels like all of this is happening in a matter of days instead of weeks.

Certainly there’s value to this compression of the narrative as it ratchets up the tension and suspense in a show where both have been largely absent (a sense of gloom and doom (“Winter is coming.”) does not equal tension or suspense) as we move into the final hours of the season, but in a show that relishes expository talk, would it have killed someone to say “It took us a month to get here!” or “Ned’s been in a cell for weeks!”?

Such dialog does not even require the use of women having sex with another! …Or is that why it wasn’t included? Read more »

“Think of it like a Kardashian: what it lacks in refinement it makes up for in cargo space.”

One step closer to the Money Bin.

It has to be a difficult task to keep blue skies in a world of ethical gray.

When it has to make the choice, White Collar tends to shift more toward “blue skies” than toward the darkness that should lie in Neal’s gray heart. The heroes and villains are clear cut, the “criminals” are more than willing to help the Feds (sometimes only needing a minor amount of arm-twisting), and Neal seems to be all but reformed. Outside of a few sideglances and the occasional twinkle in his eye when he’s impressed by a heist, Neal is the model of turning away from the dark side.

And it doesn’t feel unnatural for him to do so. He and Peter have been getting along (Bomer and DeKay’s chemistry is pretty solid) and Neal clearly loves being able to use his criminal mind without having to make an escape plan. But the show blunts its edge by making it less about “once a con-man, always a con-man” serving a the man who caught him (and enjoys the spoils) in what is essentially a glorified indentured servitude and making it more of a buddy cop show where one has the police brain while the other has the street smarts. Besides hints from Neal’s thieving buddies like Alex or Mozzie, it was starting to feel like Neal had turned his back on his past, particularly with the painful music box plot out of the way.

That’s why I’m glad season 3 looks to bring more of that edge back to the show without all that “Kate” pretense. And we don’t have to hear more about the music box. And that there is (or at least should be) more opportunities for Alex to come back, especially with Hilarie Burton being raised to season regular on the show. What a nothing character she plays.

Read more »

“I’m home. Wherever that is.”

Were it not for Pretty Little Liars I doubt I would have checked out Switched at Birth. While original content is not new to ABC Family, only in recent years has it proven to be a great cable contender. Switched at Birth carries on this new found tradition and is sure to aid ABC Family in its ratings and legitimacy as a home for great television.

Is the show landmark? No. Is it bringing new stories or ideas to the table? Yes and no. But it doesn’t always take innovation to make a hit or to tell a good story. Switched at Birth tells the story of two teenage girls who are just that: switched at birth, and the toll it begins to take on the two families involved. That’s not an unheard of story. But what makes the show interesting is the characters. And the inclusion of deaf culture. And the social commentary.

Oh yeah. And some of the people who are on the show.

The genetic quest for truth begins with a blood test. A student administered blood test. Who the hell green lit that? Terribly irresponsible. Bay’s (cool girl name alert) parents are both A so she must be A or O. Science lesson for you, kids. Bay, who is AB,  is really bothered by this blood test. She remarks that she and her mother are very different, always have been. Their hands, their bodies; they’re not alike. Was she adopted? No. But apparently she thinks it sometimes, and people ask her if she was. Bay says she needs something from her mother, no matter how odd it might sound. Six weeks later, a genetic lab has determined that it is 99.9% unlikely that Bay is the daughter of her parents. A mix up (way too light of a term for what happened) must have occurred at the hospital. See, that’s why you mark your babies before they’re taken away, right Dwight?

Read more »

“You objectify me then you deny me?”

Yeah, you right.

With a show about New Orleans, you might expect the number of scenes featuring topless women to be much higher, especially when it follows a show like Game of Thrones (which I think is only rivaled by Dream On in the gratuitous nudity department).

That’s not to say that I feel like there’s a certain quota that needs to be met or anything (though I’m pretty sure HBO execs have it on their checklists) or that the show needs nudity to stay interesting. It really doesn’t. I keep watching every week, boobs or no, and stay pretty entertained. It’s just that, as a person that’s never been to New Orleans, the town has a certain reputation. That reputation is invested in plastic beads and some drunk women making some decisions they may not normally make. Other stuff, too, like parades and tradition. But this is what late night tells me is most important.

The reason why I bring this up is because we’ve gotten to another season’s episode dedicated to Mardi Gras and, of course, nudity is far more common when Carnival shows up. But even though there are more scenes with nudity (three), two of them are just flashes or obfuscated by chaos and only one involves actual sex. Whereas other shows use nudity as a weapon against the audience’s distraction and to bring in a certain demographic every week, it’s almost like Treme doesn’t want to call attention to it. Even the episode itself, what you would imagine would be the most important episode dedicated to the most important day in New Orleans, isn’t as climactic as you’d think.

Sure, stuff happens and it’s important but, in a show that’s not really into cliffhanger storytelling, what should be a pinnacle episode is really just another building block. This is a story of the New Orleans that is more than Fat Tuesday and that we don’t end either of these seasons during Carnival contributes to that theme. In fact, that many of the major characters of the show are either disinterested in or not in attendance of the festivities is probably an important point.

Read more »

Rosie who? I no longer care. But I still love "The Killing."

Man, I loved this episode.

With her son missing, Sarah and her partner Holder scour the town in search for him.  I loved the tense interplay between Sarah and Holder, the palpable fear on Sarah’s face as she faces the same horror as the Larsens, the sense that both these detectives are so damaged but trying so hard to return to “normal” relations with their respective families. During her 10 hour search for her missing son, Sarah must face not only fear of loss but also her inadequacies as a parent. Best moment? When Holder compares Sarah to an orphaned cat who has never been taught to hide her own feces.

Heres the rub.  Do you know what was the primary trouble with this episode? It wasn’t an episode of The Killing.

Read more »

“We stand behind you, Lord Stark.“

He of the squinty eyes, very fine beard, and the stupidly noble and honorable heart.

Before I start in on the episode (and I did like it, so breathe easy), we need to talk about that little scene with Ros, the other whore, and Carcetti. For the run of this series so far, and now perhaps reaching the pinnacle of it, Game of Thrones has made sex boring.

Now, and forever, I will only associate sex with Aidan Gillen talking about the lost, unrequited love of Catelyn Stark (those Stark women, be they by blood or by marriage, linger don’t they?). Or Harry Lloyd talking about dragons.

So thank you, Game of Thrones. You’ve been the best form of birth control anyone could ask for. Well done, and kudos to you.

And now to the episode. Read more »

“You’re twice the man I thought you were.”

Imaginary friends.

Hm.

Certainly glad I stepped back from my typical rule and did the first half of this two-parter, because otherwise I would’ve just talked about the ending of this episode the entire time instead of enjoying what pleasures “The Rebel Flesh” offered. At least I was right when I said that “The Almost People” would take a sharp turn in tone (all those glorious horror gestures are all but gone here).

But here I sit, trying to decide if that ending really works for me.

The rest of the episode is pretty standard fare. Lots of running through hallways, the Doctor being clever and proving his points left and right (“No, I’ve helped him into an act of humanity.”), and it’s all very just kind of there. It’s just not particularly interesting, really, to me. Whereas “The Rebel Flesh” at least had style and mood going for it, “The Almost People” is so blandly by the numbers that it kind of offends a smidge.

But here I continue to sit. Mulling. Read more »

I realized, based on my excitement for this episode, that I hate the majority of superstars out there right now. Most of the featured artists in this season have blown. Kanye is someone whose music I love so I was pumped to have the crews dance to songs I actually enjoy. The fun part about this week was the crews weren’t dancing to just one song, it was a medley of Kanye songs. That’s how deep and awesome homeboy’s discography is.

With only three crews left I was wondering how the show was going to fill an hour. One answer came in the form a group dance featuring the remaining crews. These don’t really do it for me. They try and feature the strengths of each crew while simultaneously have them dance as a single unit, but I find the performances to be rather lackluster. Even dancing to the amazing “All of the Lights” wasn’t enough. Is it the lack of challenges? Is it the lack of competition? I dunno, but I am underwhelmed. Another answer was longer dances. This I liked. The other answer is coming later in the review.

So read on.
Read more »