Monsters of Television

“We are all love’s fools.”

It’s a terrible cliche, but it only became a cliche because it’s true. We do so very much because of love. Even the things we  do out of hate are because of love, for hate cannot exist where love has not yet been.

Take Earle, for example. His love turned to passion turned to obsession turned to hate turn to psychosis turned to him wearing a horse suit (best “disguise” so far, y’all – a horse suit). We find out here just exactly what the Black Lodge is and why Earle wants it: it’s a place where spirits make “evil for the sake of evil.” And that’s why Earle wants to find it. He wants the power of pure evil.

It’s all a little “mwahahahaha!” for my taste.

The idea that Earle became destructively obsessed with the Black Lodge and the woods surrounding Twin Peaks makes sense. As was the fact that he was removed from the project for it. But what doesn’t make sense is that a “destructively obsessed” person would give up his obsession, join the FBI, mentor Dale Cooper, lose his wife, and then – years later – finally decide to go back to his destructive obsession.

But there I go, applying logic.

At any rate, this episode is simply lousy with the love’s fools.

Black Widow continues on her quest for the Miss Twin Peaks crown, manipulating everyone she can for her love of money and attention. Bobby does his pendulum swing and makes up with Shelly, who is still in the damn contest because of her love for Bobby.

Forbidden – or at least purposefully forgotten – love haunts the Hayward household. Doc Hayward confronts Ben in his typical gentle but forceful way, and Donna finds secrets in the attic. Namely that her birth certificate carries no father’s name, and that Ben was in quite a lot of pictures with her parents. For people who pretended not to know him, they look pretty chummy. Could it be – IS BEN DONNA’S FATHER? Stay tuned for more soap opera next week.

Coop and Annie have a nice dance – with many promises of something more – though they keep getting interrupted by the mayor. Meanwhile, THE GIANT IS CONCERNED. Probably about Annie’s hairstyle choices.

Wheeler’s out of the picture, but his exit was really just an excuse for Audrey to have a super dramatic chase seen to keep him from flying away. Of course, she then has sex with him on his jet before he sails into the dusk, but what else is a girl gonna do. (Pete, bless his heart, is the one who drives her to the airport and waits for her to get through with her dalliance, despite her being very rude to him when “asking” for a ride. He also sniffles a bit at the beauty of young love, but that’s Pete for you. As is the fact that he offers to take Audrey fishing like Wheeler promised to. Awww, Pete!)

At any rate, Earle has Daddy Briggs now (why did they let him go walking in the woods when they know Earle is out there, whyyyyy?), and we know that the glyphs from Owl Cave are actually a map to the Black Lodge.

Which, apparently, is a small tar pit in the middle of the woods that offers Bob as an opening act and the red curtained room as a finale. Yay.

Notes:

• HOLY SHIT, WILLIE GARSON!
• Lucy, why is Dick even still in the running for Baby Daddy?
• The queens were all warned. Will they listen? Survey says: NO.
• Earle sounded like he had a cold this episode. Didn’t recognize his voice there at one point.
• What’s with the shaky hands? Will they be followed by mass hysteria?