Monsters of Television

The real love story at the heart of TVD

Pop quiz: If The Vampire Diaries mated with Rubicon, what would they produce? World’s fastest paced show with world’s slowest paced? Would create pretty much every other show on TV. Man does this show know how to advance a plot. And taking a page from Rubicon, it seems to be developing its characters more, too. Bonus!

This week’s episode featured collateral damage—dead people, bleeding wounds, and heartbreak—all over the place. It also featured some pretty nice character development for the show’s least interesting characters. Perhaps my theory that TVD needs to kill all its bad characters to improve them missed another option—distract the bad characters (and us) from their annoyingness by making them sexy. Still pretty sure there’s no hope for Matt. But you never know with this show.

The show opens with a flashback device: Awesome Vampire Caroline is relating to Stefan news that she had already told Damon about a prior conversation with Katherine at the grill restaurant. This annoyed me at first—it seemed to be trying too hard, with Damon constantly urging Awesome Vampire Caroline to hurry it up. With everyone in such a rush, it kinda made me wonder why we needed the flashback footage at all. Yet the use of the flashback also points to how TVD manages to keep its plot racing head—it tells it story in short form, offering quick summaries so we can get to the good stuff.

The good stuff in this instance was the Salvatore brothers being hot and bothered—and determined. Damon says, “I’m going to kill [Katherine].” Stefan replies, “You’re not going to kill her. Because I am.” Well, I don’t care who does it, just keep being all action oriented instead of moony and whiny.

Jeremy has been watching and learning from Damon’s inherent hotness, it seems, because he became a lot smarter this week, which made him much more appealing. When whiny Elena tells him that “Katherine wins. The end,” Jeremy retorts, “You’re being naïve and you know it.” Well done, Jeremy.

With Elena safely at home, Katherine shows up at the masquerade ball as Elena (when her hair is straight, she is in Elena mode, you see). Katherine has also brought a plus one, a witch named Lucy. Uh oh, Katherine has her own witch—that’s no good. Katherine complains to Lucy that Elena is a poor stylist with bad taste. “’Cept in men,” Lucy replies. Why Lucy is here is not yet clear. She says something vague, “you want me to break the curse,” seemingly in reference to the secret power of the moonstone. But that’s about all we learn here.

Before joining Jenna and Elena for world’s most boring night at home, Ric (yes, I’ve been spelling his name incorrectly for weeks) weapons up the Salvatore brothers. How Ric can date Jenna yet remain interesting is among the greatest accomplishments of this show. If only Jeremy had gotten a cross bow, his ascendance to hottie would have been complete. Elena gets suspicious that both Jeremy and Stefan have gone to the masquerade ball, so she asks Ric what is up. He tells her to let this one go. Elena, of course, does nothing of the kind. Out the door she goes.

Bonnie reluctantly agrees to help the Salvatores with their latest scheme to kill Katherine. Big talk ensues: “tonight Katherine gets a stake through her heart,” Damon promises. Well, now my expectations are through the roof, writers of TVD. Better deliver.

A great scene between Tyler and his mother follows—no, seriously, it is a good scene. His mother talks to him about their mutual sadness that Dad didn’t live to see the masquerade ball he had envisioned come to fruition. She tells her son, “it’s natural to feel abandoned. I just don’t want you to feel alone.” Nice. A mom who sorta gets her kid and isn’t completely clueless (ahem, Jenna).

Matt begins his Katherine-induced downfall by getting himself and Tyler good and drunk. The random party girls (hey, I learned their names—Amy and Sarah) are on hand to rev up the party, too.

Bonnie is prepping for her spell that will trap Katherine at the party, with an able assist from Jeremy. He’s all, “being a witch must be awesome, dude,” and Bonnie stops him right there. “It’s anything but cool…never ends well for people like me.” Hey, is that why Bonnie is such a drag all the time? Cause she doesn’t want to die? That explains so much. And makes me like her so much better.

Bonnie follows up that bit of true wisdom by immediately sensing Katherine’s witch in the room. She’s getting cooler all the time.

Katherine, sucking on a strawberry, sexily invites Stefan to dance. He’s unmoved, but when she threatens to kill someone, he agrees to dance. Katherine wants the moonstone, Stefan swears he doesn’t have it, blah blah blah. One of the random girls interrupts their “going nowhere” conversation to greet Elena/really Katherine.  I learn her name–Amy (oh, they aren’t just called, “random party girls”).   Katherine takes this opportunity to make a point.  She sticks her hand through Amy’s back, saying, “paralyzed from the waste down.” Katherine then moves her hand a bit inside poor Amy, and “dead.” Wow, that was great. I mean, sorry you are dead, Amy. I just learned your name, and all. But what a brutal and memorable way to go. Katherine ain’t f-ing around here.

Here is a good opportunity to state why this show is so fun. To some extent, everything I have described is mere set up. Getting characters in place, throwing away some tough talk, and otherwise going through the motions. Then Katherine kills a girl in a truly horrific way. Out of nowhere. With no preamble. Even during the setup, exciting things happen. TVD is never boring.

Things move more quickly now. Damon pledges loyalty to Stefan, “this woman ruined our lives, she destroyed us. Tonight, it ends. We can do it together. I’ve got your back.” And there we have the real love story of TVD—Damon and Stefan.

Now that Bonnie’s work is done, Bonnie and Jeremy have only to wait. Jeremy jokingly, but also seriously, hits on Bonnie, asking her if she wants to dance. She immediately says no, then pauses, seeing Jeremy for the first time in a new way. It had occurred to me that these two could get together, but in this moment, it actually seems not only possible but preferable. The look they share is kind of hot.

Awesome Vampire Caroline lures Katherine to the room in which she is now trapped thanks to Bonnie’s spell.  Awesome Vampire Caroline gleefully declares, “I did it!” She’s so cute. Stefan walks in from the back of the room with a stake in hand. Katherine mockingly says, “you don’t think you can kill me with that?” Stefan replies, “no, but he can.” Enter Damon with a crossbow type thing, and he shoots a stake into Katherine’s chest.

The camera cuts to Elena, outside with Jeremy. She gasps, and her back fills with blood. Uh oh. The following scenes intercut between a pretty great battle between Katherine, Stefan, and Damon, and scenes depicting a suffering Elena. With each wound Katherine suffers, Elena experiences the same wound yards away. Bonnie figures out pretty quickly that a doppleganger effect is in play—linking Katherine and Elena. Jeremy runs inside to stop the Salvatores from hurting Katherine/Elena. Katherine challenges the Salvatores to keep fighting, “something tells me my witch is better than your witch.”

Bonnie, being so clever, goes after the witch, Lucy, after Jeremy returns. Jeremy tries to feed Elena some vampire blood, but she resists. It is an odd moment, and I’m not sure if we’ll see future implications of it.

Katherine, meanwhile, has realized that Damon has become much hotter over the last two hundred years. He calls her some names, and she gets aroused: “what happened to you, Damon? You used to be so sweet and polite?” “Oh, that Damon died a long time ago. “Good, he was a bore.” Katherine then promises Damon that if he kisses her, Elena will feel that, too. Wow—that is a thought to ponder…

Matt arouses Jeremy’s anger by being a real jerk. He pours liquor on a photo of Tyler’s dad and a fight ensues. Awesome Vampire Caroline hears the noise and arrives in time to knock out Matt. While she’s checking to make sure an unconscious Matt is alive, other random girl, Sarah, gets activated by Katherine’s brain mojo. She attacks Tyler, who hits her. Down goes Sarah, hitting her head on a desk. And another werewolf is born. Luckily, Awesome Vampire Caroline is there. She lies to Tyler’s mom that Sarah accidentally died and otherwise cleans up Katherine’s mess. We don’t see all of her conversation with Tyler, but it seems she lets him know she knows his secret and can help him. Hmmm, is a friendship blossoming?

Stefan and Damon have some rather boring (comparatively) conversation with Katherine. She taunts Damon that his inconvenient obsession with her years ago forced her to make a deal with Mr. Lockwood, giving him the moonstone in exchange for her escape from the vampire tomb. Stefan, meanwhile, is curious as to whom Katherine was running form in 1864 when she faked her death. No answers are forthcoming.

Bonnie and Lucy have a conversation, during which Lucy seems to do some mojo on Bonnie, promising she can trust Lucy by giving her the moonstone. Bonnie, it seems, is no match for this older witch.

Lucy arrives with moonstone in hand. She makes Katherine promise that Lucy has fully repaid her for having saved Lucy’s life years ago. Then Lucy hands her the moonstone. All seems lost for our brave brothers. Then Katherine starts to choke–Lucy has dosed the moonstone: “you should have told me another witch was involved,” Lucy growls and exits.

Bonnie later finds Lucy outside, asking Lucy why Bonnie knew she could trust her.   No mojo involved–Lucy and Bonnie  are related, it seems, but distantly. Bonnie begs Lucy to stay, saying she has so many questions. Lucy thanks Bonnie for waking her up, reminding her that she needs to stop letting vampires get her in the middle. Bonnie agrees, saying she hates being in the middle and wants to avoid it. Lucy tells her, “unlike me, you’re one of the good ones. The middle of it is exactly where you need to be.” Seems like Bonnie has a mission.

Jeremy finds Bonnie and sees her wiping a tear. He offers her a ride home, and she asks, surprised, “when did you get your license?” “I’m not a kid anymore, Bonnie.” Again, she looks at him and seems to realize he’s a fine masculine specimen. “I’d love a ride home.”

Stefan finds the wounded but recovering Elena, and he promises that Katherine is gone. Nevertheless, Elena cannot get back into a relationship with Stefan. She needs to make sure both she and her family are safe, she explains. Stefan is sad but understands.

Damon has taken Katherine and her moonstone to the vampire tomb, where he plans to enclose her forever: “death would have been too kind.” Katherine freaks out, begging him not to leave her. “Elena is in danger…she’s a doppelganger, she needs to be protected.” Katherine reminds Damon that the fact that she didn’t kill Elena reinforces her claim of serving as Elena’s protector. Damon assures Katherine he’ll protect Elena and closes the door of the tomb.

Kinda can’t believe Katherine is already gone. Seems like there is more trouble she could cause.   Elena got largely sidelined this week—perhaps because the actress was doing serious double duty as both Elena and Katherine.  But I kinda wish the Katherine storyline had helped Elena become more action oriented, too. Sure, ingénue heroines have a long history of passively waiting for their prince to come kiss them, but we had the opportunity here for a real throw down between Elena and Katherine.  I really wanted to see that.  Perhaps we will see Katherine again sometime. I do love that Damon got to be the one to kiss her off this time.

The episode concludes with Elena getting kidnapped by some man in a mask. Katherine may be gone, but TVD continues to move full steam ahead.