Monsters of Television

“You’re hurting people I love. You’re hurting people you love.”

Sometimes when I find myself loathing a character and his/her every action I take a step back and really analyze them. I’ve come to find that in certain situations it means that character is very well done (see: Jack Shepard from LOST and Logan Echolls from Veronica Mars). After the events of season 3 I would certainly include Little J in that same category.

Little. Jenny. Humphrey. The poor nobody from Brooklyn who just wanted to be one of the popular girls. Well we’ve seen her rise to power and as the saying goes it does corrupt absolutely. This season she’s dated a drug dealer, become a drug dealer herself, attempted to steal her stepsister’s boyfriend, and tried to break up her father’s marriage. Now as of the finale she’s tried to destroy Serena further by sending a Gossip Girl blast that she slept with Dan. And she lost her virginity. To Chuck Bass (awesome!). Her stepbrother (oh, not awesome). This season for her has been very focused on destroying Serena and the funny thing about it is, she has become the very person she hates. The drugs, the betrayal: these are reasons Serena was sent away to boarding school.

And now the transformation has continued as Rufus decides to send Jenny away to Hudson to live with her mother for the summer and finish the rest of her high school career there. The last we see of Jenny is a shot of her looking out the opposite train window Serena looked out of as she came back to New York, a perfect mirroring. I have a feeling Jenny will make a grand return just as Serena did in the pilot episode, but will Jenny have learned her lesson?

To go tangential for a moment, one thing I noticed about the finale is that the characters themselves seemed to overlook is the fact that the hookups in the episode all took place between step-siblings. Dan and Serena got drunk, kissed, and fell asleep together (the basis for Jenny’s aforementioned blast on Gossip Girl). Chuck, lonely and drunk after Blair failed to show up at the Empire State Building, and Jenny, lonely after realizing how screwed up she is, end up in bed together. Sure Dan is pissed and yeah Blair is upset, but no one mentions the fact that they are related in a sense? I mean I get it, they’re all hot and they’re not really related. And who hasn’t played the “Would you bang your sister/brother/cousin/etc” game before? At least thought about it? Had a weird dream? Ok well this is awkward now. /tangent

To focus on our other slightly incestuous affair for a moment: while Dan and Serena were nowhere near as scandalous (it was only a kiss, it was only a kiss!) as Chuck and Jenny, they’re situation caused just as many ripples. Nate sent the GG blast to Vanessa (in Haiti for an internship) out of anger and then when he tried to work it out with Serena she said they need to take a break. She needs to find herself.  She even started to use the good ol’ “it’s not you, it’s me” before Nate quickly cut the cliché off. So if Jenny is the new Serena, Nate has become the new Chuck. To get over his breakup with Serena, Nate shacks up with two random lovely ladies and a whole lot of liquor. This whole Trading Places switcheroo Gossip Girl is pulling could lead to some very interesting developments in the coming season.

In appropriate Gossip Girl fashion I have spent a lot of time since the finale texting, tweeting and Facebook chatting with people about the events that took place. A lot went down in the final 5 minutes and I’m going to give you the points here at the end just as quickly.

Serena – going to Paris with Blair for the summer to get over Nate and “find herself.” Okay.

Blair – crushed after finding out Chuck slept with Jenny, running away to paris with Serena. Understandable.

Dorota – had her baby, a little girl. Aww.

Jenny – Off to Hudson to hopefully get her act together. Good riddance.

Nate – puling a Chuck. Awesome.

Dan – realizes he’s still in love with Serena. Oh, and apparently knocked up Georgina. WHAT!?

Chuck – muggers steal the ring he was going to use to propose to Blair, shoot him, and leave him in the street. OMGWTF!?

Yep. Chew on all that until September.